Welcome to my blog spot. To kick things off, I've decided to share some older blogs I had originally posted on myspace. I've included the dates they were written to alleviate any confusion as most of them are dated entries.
I will begin adding on a regular basis. I'm not in a creative place tonight, but wanted to get things started as I've had so many things to share lately. I hope you will have patience with my page being set up as I'm editing and making changes. Thank you for wanting to be here with me and take a deeper look into who I am through my true creative outlet and own personal therapy.
Hope you enjoy and please feel free to always be candid. Even if the truth hurts! =)
Important message to those who have (or want) kids 02/05/07
To all of the fathers who are an integral factor in their kids' lives I just want to say thank you. I know sometimes its rough dealing with us baby mommas cus we never seem satisfied and make your lives hell at times, but deep down we do appreciate you being there. Even though you may not be able to contribute financially, as long as you are there to teach them and love them and nurture them, that is what truly matters at the end of the day. Sure, it would be nice for you to pay child support cus they sure in the hell aint free, but don't turn your back just cus you can't pay. At least TRY! We will remember that you didn't pay, but the chances of them remembering the financial aspect are slim to none. They will remember that anytime they needed you they could pick up the phone and you came running. Its tough being a good father when you aren't with the mother, but thanks for all that you are able to do. If nobody else appreciates you, I do!!!!
Then to all of the fathers who could care less about their kids.....WTF???? Maybe I can't understand cus I'm with my kids everyday and can't imagine life without them, but I am really curious how people can disassociate themselves from their own flesh and blood. If you don't want to be in their lives, then please, strap up!!!! These kids didn't ask to come here and although God has an ultimate plan and purpose for them, its still a hard and definitely unfair road for these babies to take. Think of all the birthdays, holidays, parent-teacher conferences, SURGERIES, etc. that you are noticeably absent for. The kids don't suffer, the full-time parent gets over it but when the times come that you are ready to be that key factor in their lives there is a damn good chance they won't want to have anything to do with you. Some may be forgiving and understanding, but its unlikely. And if you aren't in your kids lives for your own selfish reasons then PLEASE don't go running across the globe letting off your sperm in any woman who will take it and then disappear. It just aint cool!
And to the ladies......I know its hard doing it alone, trust me, but be mindful of who you are laying down with. If they have 4 or 5 kids and don't do shit for them, chances are he aint gonna do nothing for yours. Trust me, I know from experience! But keep your head up, it gets better and the bond you form with your children is unbreakable! They may not show it now or even for the next few years, but one day, they will realize who was there every step of the way, and they will love and appreciate you for EVERYTHING you sacrificed for them. God gave these kids to strong women, those He knew could handle it, so don't ever think you aren't doing a good job or that you need that man to be there, cus God knows exactly what he is doing! And don't wish that you had a different baby daddy cus EVERY part of your child is the exact make-up that God wanted. These children were conceived in love (most of the time) so don't hate the man that isn't there, appreciate the fact that without him, your baby wouldn't be the same. Just pray that they take on the good qualities of each of us and then teach them not to make the same mistakes as both of their parents.
And to the childless....please take note and be mindful of what you are doing out there. STRAP UP IF YOU CAN'T HANDLE RESPONSIBILITY!!!!!!
I thank God for my beautiful babies each and every day. They are my blessings and even though I may complain at times, and they get on my LAST available nerve, I love them and can't imagine life without them. Children are God's gift to us and we must give them all that we have such as God has given us. He will never give you more than you can handle and even when it seems like no one cares about your kids but you, just know that they are loved more than you can ever imagine.
Just thought I'd share........... :)
Continue to be blessed!!!!!!!
Then to all of the fathers who could care less about their kids.....WTF???? Maybe I can't understand cus I'm with my kids everyday and can't imagine life without them, but I am really curious how people can disassociate themselves from their own flesh and blood. If you don't want to be in their lives, then please, strap up!!!! These kids didn't ask to come here and although God has an ultimate plan and purpose for them, its still a hard and definitely unfair road for these babies to take. Think of all the birthdays, holidays, parent-teacher conferences, SURGERIES, etc. that you are noticeably absent for. The kids don't suffer, the full-time parent gets over it but when the times come that you are ready to be that key factor in their lives there is a damn good chance they won't want to have anything to do with you. Some may be forgiving and understanding, but its unlikely. And if you aren't in your kids lives for your own selfish reasons then PLEASE don't go running across the globe letting off your sperm in any woman who will take it and then disappear. It just aint cool!
And to the ladies......I know its hard doing it alone, trust me, but be mindful of who you are laying down with. If they have 4 or 5 kids and don't do shit for them, chances are he aint gonna do nothing for yours. Trust me, I know from experience! But keep your head up, it gets better and the bond you form with your children is unbreakable! They may not show it now or even for the next few years, but one day, they will realize who was there every step of the way, and they will love and appreciate you for EVERYTHING you sacrificed for them. God gave these kids to strong women, those He knew could handle it, so don't ever think you aren't doing a good job or that you need that man to be there, cus God knows exactly what he is doing! And don't wish that you had a different baby daddy cus EVERY part of your child is the exact make-up that God wanted. These children were conceived in love (most of the time) so don't hate the man that isn't there, appreciate the fact that without him, your baby wouldn't be the same. Just pray that they take on the good qualities of each of us and then teach them not to make the same mistakes as both of their parents.
And to the childless....please take note and be mindful of what you are doing out there. STRAP UP IF YOU CAN'T HANDLE RESPONSIBILITY!!!!!!
I thank God for my beautiful babies each and every day. They are my blessings and even though I may complain at times, and they get on my LAST available nerve, I love them and can't imagine life without them. Children are God's gift to us and we must give them all that we have such as God has given us. He will never give you more than you can handle and even when it seems like no one cares about your kids but you, just know that they are loved more than you can ever imagine.
Just thought I'd share........... :)
Continue to be blessed!!!!!!!
My Katrina Loss-RIP Uncle Pat 08/29/08
Even though it was 3 years ago we lost my Uncle Pat, each year on the anniversary of Katrina, I think of what he endured by staying behind trying to fight the storm head on.
See, my Uncle Pat was 80 years old and the previous year he had evacuated to Texas with his children, grandchildren and great-grandchildren. That ride proved to be to hard on him, sitting in hours of traffic, babies crying, all to be a false alarm. Sure, his family begged him to leave. Sure, his family worried about him.
But if people survived Hurricane Betsy, Katrina would be no match, right?
As a child, my favorite Christmas moments were spent with my family at Aunt Celie and Uncle Pat's house. Uncle Pat would dress up like Santa Claus and hand out presents to all of the children. I still have pictures. It had to be at least 100 or more family members gathered together. The Gracianette's, Turner's, Joubert's and more had met in their New Orleans East home for over 50 years. And as I was still evacuated in Dallas, it was devastating to think that this would be one of the first Christmas holidays that I didn't spend with them.
There was an article printed in the Times-Picayune about my uncle a few months after the storm. It read of many wonderful things about my family and our traditions. But one thing that has never left me is what they found when the recovery team tore into his attic. They believed he suffocated from the heat and lack of oxygen when he climbed up towards the roof to avoid the rising water. As he lay there, he had on his Tulane Green Wave baseball cap, his rosary in one hand and a picture of my Aunt Celie in the other. A devout Catholic, a loving husband and a dedicated fan. The true essence of our New Orleans heritage.
To those who lost family, friends, pets, homes, etc. let us never loose that essence of who we are. We may have been forgotten those first few days when the levees broke, but now let us stand strong together and rebuild a better New Orleans and become a place they will never forget. Yes, we have great food, the best parties and unique culture, but lets remind the world that we have great people too, with a great love for our city, who deserve the right and RESPECT to rebuild whats ours.
In memory of everyone we lost as a result of Hurricane Katrina. May you rest in eternal peace forever.
See, my Uncle Pat was 80 years old and the previous year he had evacuated to Texas with his children, grandchildren and great-grandchildren. That ride proved to be to hard on him, sitting in hours of traffic, babies crying, all to be a false alarm. Sure, his family begged him to leave. Sure, his family worried about him.
But if people survived Hurricane Betsy, Katrina would be no match, right?
As a child, my favorite Christmas moments were spent with my family at Aunt Celie and Uncle Pat's house. Uncle Pat would dress up like Santa Claus and hand out presents to all of the children. I still have pictures. It had to be at least 100 or more family members gathered together. The Gracianette's, Turner's, Joubert's and more had met in their New Orleans East home for over 50 years. And as I was still evacuated in Dallas, it was devastating to think that this would be one of the first Christmas holidays that I didn't spend with them.
There was an article printed in the Times-Picayune about my uncle a few months after the storm. It read of many wonderful things about my family and our traditions. But one thing that has never left me is what they found when the recovery team tore into his attic. They believed he suffocated from the heat and lack of oxygen when he climbed up towards the roof to avoid the rising water. As he lay there, he had on his Tulane Green Wave baseball cap, his rosary in one hand and a picture of my Aunt Celie in the other. A devout Catholic, a loving husband and a dedicated fan. The true essence of our New Orleans heritage.
To those who lost family, friends, pets, homes, etc. let us never loose that essence of who we are. We may have been forgotten those first few days when the levees broke, but now let us stand strong together and rebuild a better New Orleans and become a place they will never forget. Yes, we have great food, the best parties and unique culture, but lets remind the world that we have great people too, with a great love for our city, who deserve the right and RESPECT to rebuild whats ours.
In memory of everyone we lost as a result of Hurricane Katrina. May you rest in eternal peace forever.
The Presidential Election 11/05/08
Its really a shame that in the year 2008, there is still so much racism spewing from the mouths of American citizens. Barack Obama accomplished an amazing feat, and not just because he is black, but because he was a relatively unknown coming into this election. He was able to unite this country (or most of us, at least) and make us passionate about the importance of being Amercian and he gave us a renewed interest in politics and our government. Of course, there will be issues we won't all agree upon, but that would happen with ANY candidate. I don't agree with Barack on everything, however, I know he is the better man for the job and I have faith that not only will he make the right decisions for us, he will put the right people along side him to lead us in a positive direction.
The things people have been saying about his win have been mean, hateful and downright racist and that is the opposite of what we want for ourselves and our children. Its just very sad for me to see so many of my colleagues' moods saying disgusted, pissed off, angry, disgusted, enraged and then the ignorant comments that are attached to them. Obama is NOT the anti-christ, he is NOT lazy nor are his supporters, its not going to be a long 4 years because these last 8 years were already an eternity of hell! Look, we all have our own opinions and feelings and reasons behind why we support people, but at least be factual and be a gracious loser as John McCain truly was. McCain impressed me last night with his speech and reminded us that we do need to stand behind our President and give him the support he needs to make this country great again. He reminded us that just a short while ago, black leaders such as Reverand Martin Luther King, Jr. dreamed of this moment for the UNITED STATES. He stood there and as his followers booed, he genuinely gave his full support to our next leader, as should we all.
I've also noticed that those who are angry and disappointed are basically limited to this area. My friends and family in New York, California, and other northern states are truly excited about the new change this country is headed for. Have respect for each other people!!! We should be proud that we have elected the first black president during our lifetime. We should be proud that we had two women who barely missed being in the white house. We should be proud that we have learned to accept the minority as a majority and that we are showing the world that we have finally regained the respect this country has lost in recent years. Let's not bask in hatred or lies, but rather be accepting and understanding of each other and what we just witnessed as one of the most historical moments in our lives. We need to understand how important this election was for blacks, whites, latinos, asians, native americans, etc.
For a country that has been divided for so long, we can now proudly stand tall and call ourselves true citizens of the UNITED STATES OF AMERICA!!!!!!!!!!
We should all join together and support our new president and lift him, his family and his newly assigned cabinet up in prayer that he will serve us to the best of his ability and that God will guide his every move in the best interest of the American public. Let's put aside the hate, negativity and evilness and remember that God makes NO mistakes and He will protect us and has chosen the right person to lead us.
Wake up, people!!!! Change is coming and its long overdue!
The things people have been saying about his win have been mean, hateful and downright racist and that is the opposite of what we want for ourselves and our children. Its just very sad for me to see so many of my colleagues' moods saying disgusted, pissed off, angry, disgusted, enraged and then the ignorant comments that are attached to them. Obama is NOT the anti-christ, he is NOT lazy nor are his supporters, its not going to be a long 4 years because these last 8 years were already an eternity of hell! Look, we all have our own opinions and feelings and reasons behind why we support people, but at least be factual and be a gracious loser as John McCain truly was. McCain impressed me last night with his speech and reminded us that we do need to stand behind our President and give him the support he needs to make this country great again. He reminded us that just a short while ago, black leaders such as Reverand Martin Luther King, Jr. dreamed of this moment for the UNITED STATES. He stood there and as his followers booed, he genuinely gave his full support to our next leader, as should we all.
I've also noticed that those who are angry and disappointed are basically limited to this area. My friends and family in New York, California, and other northern states are truly excited about the new change this country is headed for. Have respect for each other people!!! We should be proud that we have elected the first black president during our lifetime. We should be proud that we had two women who barely missed being in the white house. We should be proud that we have learned to accept the minority as a majority and that we are showing the world that we have finally regained the respect this country has lost in recent years. Let's not bask in hatred or lies, but rather be accepting and understanding of each other and what we just witnessed as one of the most historical moments in our lives. We need to understand how important this election was for blacks, whites, latinos, asians, native americans, etc.
For a country that has been divided for so long, we can now proudly stand tall and call ourselves true citizens of the UNITED STATES OF AMERICA!!!!!!!!!!
We should all join together and support our new president and lift him, his family and his newly assigned cabinet up in prayer that he will serve us to the best of his ability and that God will guide his every move in the best interest of the American public. Let's put aside the hate, negativity and evilness and remember that God makes NO mistakes and He will protect us and has chosen the right person to lead us.
Wake up, people!!!! Change is coming and its long overdue!
Final Moments With My Maw Maw 12/15/08
Most of you may know about the struggles my grandmother has been having with pancreatic cancer. It was the reason I moved home so suddenly, so that I could be with her as much as possible. I thank God everyday for making that impulsive, yet wise decision.
These last few months have been very trying, watching her health decline knowing the outcome of her fate. But it has been these moments that have helped me become closer to God. It is through her that I have seen His almighty power and unwavering love. Today, was truly the most awesome moment I have shared with my family and God in my entire life.
I knew these past 2 weeks were her last precious moments here on earth. It's been very challenging because her condition would vary so drastically from one day to the next. Sometimes within the same day. I've been talking to her, thanking her for everything she has done for me, telling her how much I love her and sharing special memories I've had with her. Yesterday my mom called and said I needed to get to the house because they were expecting it to be her last 24 hours. My daughters and I spent most of the day with her and the family preparing for the worst. So many moments appeared to be touch and go, thinking each gasp was her last breath. It was utterly devastating, but I prayed and asked God for peace and strength. From that minute, I stopped crying and felt that peace come over me and my heart filled with so much strength.
Today, after church, I went back to my maw maw's house. She seemed so much better! At one point she just barely opened her eyes while I was holding her hand and I was so excited. She was able to see me and hear me say I love you once again. Knowing she is nearing the end, my family had the priest come over and say her final rites. I've never experienced anything like this before in my life. First of all, this priest is so incredibly awesome!!!! He truly has an anointing on his life and it is so evident. All of my grandmother's six children stood around the bed while we prayed with her, led by Father Beau. They graciously allowed me to share this moment and let me tell you what a blessing it was. I felt the presence of God so strongly today as we all stood there on one accord asking our Father to bless her and prepare her for the journey to finally meet Him. I was so fortunate to be at the foot of her bed, able to stroke her hair and hold her. What an AWESOME feeling!!! After Father Beau left, we all told her goodbye, one by one, and then sat around for the next hour laughing about the wonderful memories we have with her. When I left, I had so much peace it is really unexplainable.
As of this moment, 8:40pm, her heartbeat is still strong and apparently her will even stronger. Although, her final resting moment is near, I think we are all okay with it. Of course, we want our loved ones to live forever, but I'm comfortable knowing that I will have such a perfect angel in heaven watching over me and my baby girls. We are so blessed to have had her so many years and to have learned so many valuable things from her. But the greatest blessing of all, was being with her during her preparation to finally meet Him. It is a moment I will cherish everyday knowing that God chose me as one of the people to help guide her to Him. And thank you to my family for allowing me to also share such awesome moment with them.
I love you Maw Maw and whenever you are ready to go, I will understand. I may cry and be sad but only because you mean so much to me and I will miss you so terribly. But please know that I will be okay, having you to watch over me and love me when I need you the most. You have always been my rock, the one person who always believed in me, who sometimes I think knows me better than anyone else. You've loved me unconditionally, wholeheartedly and you never gave up on me. You've always seen the best in me, loving me when I wasn't easy to love, praying for me every day only wishing the best for me and never, ever turning your back to me. When times get rough, I know I will feel your hugs, your gentleness and your love. There are no words to express my gratitude for everything you've done for me and no way to measure my love for you. Thank you for giving me the best mom anybody could ask for, the most wonderful aunts and uncles, and most importantly, thanks for being my maw maw. I love you and will miss you so much.
These last few months have been very trying, watching her health decline knowing the outcome of her fate. But it has been these moments that have helped me become closer to God. It is through her that I have seen His almighty power and unwavering love. Today, was truly the most awesome moment I have shared with my family and God in my entire life.
I knew these past 2 weeks were her last precious moments here on earth. It's been very challenging because her condition would vary so drastically from one day to the next. Sometimes within the same day. I've been talking to her, thanking her for everything she has done for me, telling her how much I love her and sharing special memories I've had with her. Yesterday my mom called and said I needed to get to the house because they were expecting it to be her last 24 hours. My daughters and I spent most of the day with her and the family preparing for the worst. So many moments appeared to be touch and go, thinking each gasp was her last breath. It was utterly devastating, but I prayed and asked God for peace and strength. From that minute, I stopped crying and felt that peace come over me and my heart filled with so much strength.
Today, after church, I went back to my maw maw's house. She seemed so much better! At one point she just barely opened her eyes while I was holding her hand and I was so excited. She was able to see me and hear me say I love you once again. Knowing she is nearing the end, my family had the priest come over and say her final rites. I've never experienced anything like this before in my life. First of all, this priest is so incredibly awesome!!!! He truly has an anointing on his life and it is so evident. All of my grandmother's six children stood around the bed while we prayed with her, led by Father Beau. They graciously allowed me to share this moment and let me tell you what a blessing it was. I felt the presence of God so strongly today as we all stood there on one accord asking our Father to bless her and prepare her for the journey to finally meet Him. I was so fortunate to be at the foot of her bed, able to stroke her hair and hold her. What an AWESOME feeling!!! After Father Beau left, we all told her goodbye, one by one, and then sat around for the next hour laughing about the wonderful memories we have with her. When I left, I had so much peace it is really unexplainable.
As of this moment, 8:40pm, her heartbeat is still strong and apparently her will even stronger. Although, her final resting moment is near, I think we are all okay with it. Of course, we want our loved ones to live forever, but I'm comfortable knowing that I will have such a perfect angel in heaven watching over me and my baby girls. We are so blessed to have had her so many years and to have learned so many valuable things from her. But the greatest blessing of all, was being with her during her preparation to finally meet Him. It is a moment I will cherish everyday knowing that God chose me as one of the people to help guide her to Him. And thank you to my family for allowing me to also share such awesome moment with them.
I love you Maw Maw and whenever you are ready to go, I will understand. I may cry and be sad but only because you mean so much to me and I will miss you so terribly. But please know that I will be okay, having you to watch over me and love me when I need you the most. You have always been my rock, the one person who always believed in me, who sometimes I think knows me better than anyone else. You've loved me unconditionally, wholeheartedly and you never gave up on me. You've always seen the best in me, loving me when I wasn't easy to love, praying for me every day only wishing the best for me and never, ever turning your back to me. When times get rough, I know I will feel your hugs, your gentleness and your love. There are no words to express my gratitude for everything you've done for me and no way to measure my love for you. Thank you for giving me the best mom anybody could ask for, the most wonderful aunts and uncles, and most importantly, thanks for being my maw maw. I love you and will miss you so much.
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